You can't change people
You always get told that you can't change anyone but yourself, however you kind of don't follow it. You wishing that someone is different is kind of trying to change them because over time you actions will prove this.
Look at it like this. You have a friend that's bad in keeping contact with you, and you start wishing they did. Over time your going to keep telling them "why don't you call anyone" or "I guess we're not that close then" trying to make them feel bad and see your point (which they should I'm not going to lie). Trying to change someone is not just telling them what you want them to do but trying to make them passively change too.
I've just learnt that you have to leave people to figure things out for themselves, because if you keep on telling someone what you want from them, chances are they'll change for a second or get annoyed with you. Leave it. Let that someone realise that without calling you they're not going to have that person that they can trust with their problems or that they can banter with. If the person really means something, they'll have that something isn't right feeling and change themselves. Trust me that change will last longer because they've felt that for themselves rather than having someone else to tell them.
It's like being told that the guy/girl your with is using you. Until you see it or feel it for yourself you're not going to change and leave that person; even if people keep telling you. However when you do realise, you probably stop being with that person also look out for the same signs when with someone else.
Yes I agree you can't change anyone but yourself, but this saying isn't easy to listen to when in that situation. Instead I would say
Look at it like this. You have a friend that's bad in keeping contact with you, and you start wishing they did. Over time your going to keep telling them "why don't you call anyone" or "I guess we're not that close then" trying to make them feel bad and see your point (which they should I'm not going to lie). Trying to change someone is not just telling them what you want them to do but trying to make them passively change too.
I've just learnt that you have to leave people to figure things out for themselves, because if you keep on telling someone what you want from them, chances are they'll change for a second or get annoyed with you. Leave it. Let that someone realise that without calling you they're not going to have that person that they can trust with their problems or that they can banter with. If the person really means something, they'll have that something isn't right feeling and change themselves. Trust me that change will last longer because they've felt that for themselves rather than having someone else to tell them.
It's like being told that the guy/girl your with is using you. Until you see it or feel it for yourself you're not going to change and leave that person; even if people keep telling you. However when you do realise, you probably stop being with that person also look out for the same signs when with someone else.
Yes I agree you can't change anyone but yourself, but this saying isn't easy to listen to when in that situation. Instead I would say
Comments
Post a Comment